COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS?

COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS?

This topic has been on heavy on my heart for the past few months. As I have been learning how to deal with it, through prayer and reading my WORD. I felt it was best to literally start a blog, and write about it.

Being that I am heavily into the social media; Instagram, Facebook, etc. because of my field. I find it extremely hard not to get sucked into the non sense. Even though I rarely post, doesn't mean I am not lurking to see whats happening in the world. When I say in the "world", I mean, my friends lives, entertainment, gossip, fitness stuff, dance classes, who's getting booked, blah blah. All the things I actually care about. However, there was a time when I rarely use to go on the 'explore page' on Instagram. The reason, was because I had a fear. A fear of seeing anything that made me feel less of a person because of where I was at, in my life. For instance, if I happened to see someone who got engaged- like a super cute couple. I would literally want to cry!!!

Now, some of you would think- girl, You are tripping! And then there are some who can relate! Lets not act like we haven't had our emotions get the best of us when we see someone in a place in their lives, where we wish we were.

To be honest, I would break down inside. Wondering WHY GOD???? Why cant I have that too? Or when is my time going to come? What have I done, or not done to deserve what I have now, and why haven't you taken me to where I want to be already!? It could've been anything. You name it, I see a friend who's dancing in LA, I'd instantly get upset. Like uggggghhhhh.... this life I have sucks. I see a pretty girl with all the flyest clothes, get mad that I didn't have fly clothes, or the money to ball out and just shop til I drop. See a cute couple, married about to have their first child, I'd get sad. I was bugging out!!! As crazy as it sounds, I would literally feel like that. My heart wasn't right, and God wasn't pleased.

As time went on, and I continued to pray. "Lord, open up doors of opportunity, and just let Your Will be done." God started opening doors for me. Knowing good and well, I did not deserve these blessings with my ungrateful self! However, once I started accepting where I was in life, and stopped caring. Thats when things started looking different for me. I was blessed with a new job, and after that door opened, another one did. Then there were 3 more- and I was a full time dance instructor and a wife! Now Im not saying I finally got my perfect life after that. ABSOLUTELY NOT!

It actually got harder! You ask, how did it get harder if things finally started falling into place? Didn't you finally start getting what you want? My answer, once again- ABSOLUTELY NOT! So fast forward to the (now) Me being more the more mature TiAna.

It finally clicked one day. I stopped comparing myself to the things and people of this world. Somehow the thought came randomly...

"Don't waste time trying to compare your life with people who have it all together (now). they may not actually have it together behind closed doors. and/or if they do- it wasn't always like that. i am in a different place now, from where I (use) to be , so I know I will not be where I am now, for too long.."

-Tiana

It gets so hard trying not to compare your life with other peoples, and what you see. I am not saying that I don't get caught up feeling certain ways. Because I definitely do sometimes. Then I have to catch myself- and literally remind myself WHO I AM!

As a young woman or man, we must know who we are in Christ. Who has God called you to be? What has He called you to do? Once the answer is found. The comparing is over. It is way easier said than done, especially when you are not quite where you want to be. Trust me, I know. I'm still not where I want to be in life. However, as I grow more, and mature. I realize people only showcase their "highlights" and accomplishments. They never showcase their "Low lights" and struggles.

I've learned that nobody has a perfect life. Nobody has a perfect marriage. Nobody has a perfect job, nobody has a perfect relationship. There are even some people who we think are perfect and are hurting inside. Everyone has to work for something, and it never ends. Happiness comes from within. God is the only source that can fulfill that desire. We must KNOW who we are in Christ, and walk with purpose. Otherwise, we will find ourselves just living to keep up with the the people we got so caught up comparing ourselves with.

The enemy will try to distract you from your purpose and throw you off. Even using people closest to you. He will try to make you think what they have is better than what you have. Or, where they are in life is a better place than where you are. Do NOT fall victim to that. Do not give the enemy the power to make you feel like what God has blessed you with is worthless. Where you at in your life, is where God designed you to be at this very moment. Where you are going is a place too big to imagine. God will only bless us with what He knows we are able to manage at this point in time. If you are only able to manage $5.00, why would He give you $20.00? Take a moment and think about how far you have come in your life. Make a list of things you set out to accomplish back then. Then take the things you are doing now, you are not in the same place you were back then, and I'm sure back then- you couldn't think about being where you are now. So imagine where you are going? Continue to work on yourself, so that you can be the best YOU, for you and God. Not for other people.

When you start to feel discouraged about these things. Take the time to encourage yourself by praying this prayer:

Dear Lord, I come to you, humbly. I repent of the things I have said and done that has not been pleasing to you. I am grateful for my blessings. Grateful for the things you have blessed me with, you are blessing me with, and what you are going to bless me with. Thank you for creating me in your image. I will not compare my life and myself to the people and things of this world. Please continue to be the ruler over my thoughts and allow me to be in control of my emotions. I give you Glory, Honor and Praise. In the mighty name of Jesus, I pray. -Amen.

When you're feeling down..

Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Proverbs 31:25(NLT)

"She is clothed with strength and dignity,and she laughs without fear of the future."

Proverbs 20:5 (NIV)

"The purposes of a person’s heart are deep waters,but one who has insight draws them out."

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